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Statistics from the national coalition on domestic violence On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. During one year, this equates to more than 10 million women and men. 1 in 4 women and 1 in 9 men experience severe intimate partner physical violence, intimate partner contact sexual violence, and/or intimate partner stalking with impacts such as injury, fearfulness, post-traumatic stress disorder, use of victim services, contraction of sexually transmitted diseases, etc. 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have experienced some form of physical violence by an intimate partner. This includes a range of behaviors (e.g. slapping, shoving, pushing) and in some cases might not be considered "domestic violence. 1 in 7 women and 1 in 25 men have been injured by an intimate partner. 1 in 10 women have been raped by an intimate partner. Data is unavailable on male victims. 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men have been victims of severe physical violence (e.g. beating, burning, strangling) by an intimate partner in their lifetime. 1 in 4 women and 1 in 7 men have been victims of severe physical violence (e.g. beating, burning, strangling) by an intimate partner in their lifetime. On a typical day, there are more than 20,000 phone calls placed to domestic violence hotlines nationwide. The presence of a gun in a domestic violence situation increases the risk of homicide by 500%. Intimate partner violence accounts for 15% of all violent crime. Women between the ages of 18-24 are most commonly abused by an intimate partner. 19% of domestic violence involves a weapon. Domestic victimization is correlated with a higher rate of depression and suicidal behavior. Only 34% of people who are injured by intimate partners receive medical care for their injuries. 1 in 15 children are exposed to intimate partner violence each year, and 90% of these children are eyewitnesses to this violence.

How to document domestic violence Documenting abuse can be a step in getting yourself to safety and out of an abusive situation. It can also help if you are planning on pressing charges against your abuser. ​ When documenting abuse, keep your safety as your number one priority. It is not uncommon for an abuser to hack into or monitor your phone, computer, email, and other online communications. This can make storing screenshots, pictures, and other messages challenging. One suggestion is to open up a private email account on a computer at your local library and only access it there. That way your evidence is not compromised if your personal email address is being monitored. You can keep notes on each incident as well as pictures and screenshots. When documenting abuse, keep these 5 questions in mind: WHO? WHAT? WHEN? WHERE? HOW? Answer these in as much detail as you can. Consider things like threats, weapons, and objects used, witnesses, date, time, location, and exact quotes. Use words like hit, pushed, smacked, struck with an object (name the object used), or scratched when writing down what happened. Is the furniture overturned, vehicles damaged, holes in the wall, or the house in disarray? Write it all down in a safe, private email and send it to yourself through that same email address Sharing how the incident made you feel shows the impact it had on you. Take pictures of abuse right after is occurs as well as during the healing process. This shows proof of your injuries and can be used in court. Keep all photos in their original condition - no photoshopping or touching them up. Even touching them up for lighting needs to be avoided. Store them in your private email and delete originals from your phone. All hospital records need to be stored as well. Another item to keep track of is threatening texts. Do not respond to them. Screenshot and send these to your private email. If the abuser calls 40 times in a row, screenshot that as well. If the abuser calls, let it go to voicemail so their words can be recorded. Download the voicemail and save it in your private email. If possible, record verbal abuse on your phone while it is in your pocket. Only do this if you are sure the abuser will not be suspicious. Send all recordings to your private email and delete them from your phone. If you want to share your evidence with someone, make sure you can trust them. Sharing with mutual friends and family is not a good idea at this point. You might start feeling confident as you start collecting and documenting this evidence but avoid changing your behavior as it might arouse suspicion. Do not forget your goal. It is OK to take your time getting everything you need. ​

What is domestic violence? Domestic violence is abuse that occurs in a domestic setting, such as marriage or cohabitation. Domestic violence takes place against partners (current or past), parents, the elderly, and children. It can take place between heterosexual or same-sex couples. The U.S. Department of Justice defines domestic violence as a pattern of abusive behavior in any intimate relationship, past or present, that is used by one person or partner to get or maintain control over the other person or partner. Every year in America, 10 million women and men are victims of domestic violence and each day over 20,000 calls are made to domestic violence hotlines across the country. Types of Domestic Violence Emotional and Verbal Abuse is a pattern of non-physical acts and behaviors that is meant to control, scare, or isolate a person. It lowers the victim’s sense of identity and self-worth and can cause a decline in their mental health. Here are some examples: Humiliating the victim in public or in private Name calling, shaming, put-downs, blaming Intimidating or threats of harm Isolating from supportive family and friends Demanding all time be spent together Intense jealousy Dismissing or invalidating the victim’s feelings or needs Threatening to kill themselves Deny or lying about an event Withholding affection or giving the silent treatment Treating victim like a possession or property Refusing to take part in the relationship Physical Abuse is injury or trauma to the body that is deliberately caused. Here are some examples: Punching, hitting, slapping, kicking, pushing, biting, cutting, stabbing, shooting, etc. Suffocating, strangling (sometimes called choking), scalding, burning Physically restraining or trapping in a room/closet, holding hostage, forcing drugs, or giving them without the victim’s knowledge Withholding food or medical care Hitting walls, kicking down doors, throwing objects, destroying property Threatening with a weapon or physical assault (this includes threatening to harm children and pets) Sexual Abuse is any non-consensual and/or non-sober sexual act. It can involve pressure or coercion and is often forced. This type of abuse frequently takes place in intimate relationships, such as marriage. Here are some examples: Forcing or manipulating victim into having sex or perform sexual acts Insulting in sexual ways or calling explicit names Choking or restraining during sex without consent Hurting with weapons or objects during sex Involving other people in sexual acts without consent Ignoring victim’s feelings about sex Forcing to watch or make porn Financial Abuse is a way to keep a victim financially unstable as well as keeping them dependent. Financial abuse makes it difficult for a victim to leave an abuser in order to gain safety. Here are some examples: Controlling use or access to money Confiscating victim’s money, credit cards, or paycheck Hiding or taking funds Refusing to work or contribute to household budget Sabotaging victim’s work responsibilities (examples are calling and texting incessantly or unhooking car battery) ​ Pet Abuse is when an abuser uses pets to coerce and control a victim. A beloved pet is like a family member and can, unfortunately, be used as a powerful tool in domestic abuse. Of course, these actions are a part of domestic violence, but are also animal abuse in themselves. Some signs of an abused pet include a tucked tail, flinching at human contact, unexplained fractures, unprovoked aggression, overly submissive, being left in a kennel or chained outside exclusively. Here are some ways an abuser uses a pet to control the victim: Threatening to harm, kill or get rid of a pet. Not allowing basic pet care such as feeding and access to an area to go to the bathroom. Not allowing money to be spent on the pet for basic items such as food or veterinary care. Threatening to get rid of a service or emotional support animal that is vital to the victim's wellbeing. Treating the animal better than partner and/or children. Religious Abuse is using scripture and/or traditions to force or coerce a victim to submit or behave. Using scripture and/or traditions to encourage someone to submit. Ridiculing or insulting the other person's religion or spiritual beliefs. Isolating you from your faith community or not allowing a person to practice their beliefs. Using the faith community to encourage someone to stay in an abusive relationship. Using scripture to blame the victim or justify the abuse. Using scripture or traditions to limit access to health care. Using scripture or traditions to control a victim's sexuality and/or reproduction. As you can tell, the types of domestic violence are many. Just because someone is not being physically abused doesn't mean they aren't being harmed. Other types of abuse can be just as traumatic as physical abuse, but without the bruises. If someone you know is in an abusive relationship of any kind, the best thing you can do is to listen and believe them. ​